I’ve been putting this entry off because 2004 wasn’t exactly a happy year for me.
I am so very glad it is over.
I think I said that about 2003 too.
It got off to a good start. I met a new guy who turned into my boyfriend (we just celebrated our one year on the 11th).
We’ve had a bumpy year together. A few near-breakups. Mostly stupid stuff. Now that our first year together is over I am hopeful that the BS is behind us.
He was labeled a rebound date. A year later I think its safe to say he is not a rebound. LOL.
This year I took a stand for Mother Earth and enforced recycling at my home. It caused some conflict but it was the right and responsible thing to do. My household generates a lot of recyclable waste and now we’re keeping that out of the landfill. In fact, its been so good that I can often skip taking the trash out to the curb for a week because most of our trash is plastic, aluminum or tin.
I also took a stand for my well-being and cut out a huge source of stress from my life. That schutta just crossed a line by trying to change the feeding regiment for the cats in my house and that was the straw that broke this camel’s back. My cat was spared from being starved while the fat one ate the reduced amount of food.
As for work, things remained much the same. I still work and play in the land of Xbox. It is good here. I still like it a lot. Good people, hard work.
The holidays this year were quite a downer. I had to force myself to decorate for the dark holiday. It was half-way into October before I brought the stuff out of the garage and into the house. I never actually finished. Cobwebbing is a team effort and my “team” bailed on me before we could complete.
No party this year, for the first time in recent memory. I didn’t even dress up. I handed out the candy like I always do, handfuls of the good stuff. It brought a small amount of joy to me, but all in all, this year’s halloween was pretty sad.
My lack of holiday spirit spilled over into the remaining holidays. For Thanksgiving we actually did make dinner for ourselves and a few guests. We fried up a turkey which was really good. Had a ton of food. I fell asleep shortly after eating it. It was probably the happiest of the holidays this year. The only real joy I got out of it though was the inflatable turkey. Unfortunantly Mike ripped it trying to be funny in the snow. He said he’d fix it but it remains in the garage untouched. I guess I won’t get to enjoy it this year.
Christmas I skipped entirely. My halloween tree is still up and sorta served as a christmas tree I guess, but it hasn’t been lit in months. Maybe I should take it down.
For New Years eve, it snowed and so I remained at home and watched television.
Perhaps it was the loss of my kitten that took the cheer out of me. The last time I saw her was the day I forced myself to decorate for Halloween. She has been missing in action since 10/15/2004. Despite being chipped, she has not turned up. I’ve been getting daily emails from the animal shelter on their new arrivals, but she has not been one of them. I canvassed the neighborhood with fliers and people took my number, but no one called.
My cat is lost and it still weighs heavily on my mind. I only see her now on the dreamscape. There is a small hope that she will pull a Narc and come home one day, months later. She is probably coyote feed though. Unless she was brought in by someone who took pitty on her, there is no way she would have survived the winter weather we’ve been having.
I enter 2005 depressed. I find myself debating on whether I am living or waiting to die. I find little in this world to bring me joy and much to bring me grief. It is winter though and so such depression must be taken with a grain of salt. Winter always depresses me.
My excitement in 2004 has centered around two rovers on the Martian surface: Spirit and Opportunity. Their exploration (now well beyond their intended lifespan) has provided us with proof positive that Mars was once a wetter and more hospitable world. And these robots just keep roving.
I’m still pessimistic about my nation’s future. A president was reelected to a second term. At least he can’t run again. But he has damaged this country in ways we probably don’t yet realize. I hope we can make it another four years under his misguided leadership. Maybe when he has moved out of office the spirit of America can be reborn. It will take a long time to heal the wounds he has inflicted upon it.
I have little good to say about 2004 and 2005 isn’t shaping up any better thusfar. Thankfully its still quite early in the year. 🙂